Adaptation and Identification

Traveling as much as I do is an exercise in adaptation. My husband and I stay overseas often for an extended period of time - several weeks or months.

We don't stay in tourist areas, but live where the locals live. Sometimes there is a lot of difference between the two. I prefer living among the people. I get a much better perspective.

Although my primary frame of reference is American, I am very happy to say that my frame has grown and keeps growing. Adaptation to other cultures has given me a better and broader world view.

Since we do live among the people for extended periods, there are many things I need to discover about each new location. Will I be close to public transportation? Are schedules reliable? Do many people speak English? Can I safely walk in the neighborhoods? Are dogs behind fences or are they allowed to roam the streets? What are the expectations concerning pedestrians and driving?

When staying somewhere for more than a few days, it becomes necessary to set up housekeeping (of a sort). Sometimes I know in advance what the accommodations are like. Many times I don't.  Where we stay has a bearing on how much I can do for myself. Will we be in a room or an apartment?  Will I have an oven, a stovetop, a refrigerator or internet connection? Will I have access to a washing machine or will I be doing laundry by hand?

Packing for such a trip is always a challenge. Is it going to be cold or hot (we've had many surprises in that area!)? Do I need to pack hangers, a coffee pot or an electric kettle?  Several things I never regret packing are:

• ziplock bags (few countries other than the U.S. have these) 
• headache medicine, sleep aids, stomach medicine, etc. (sometimes these are very hard to obtain)
• a pillowcase (I often use this for laundry although it has come in handy when the pillows do not have pillowcases. I have even used a pillowcase for a hand towel.) 
• cloth shopping bags (even though the U.S. is starting to encourage people to use these, other countries charge for their own bags!)
• soap
• a small flashlight (sometimes used as a reading light when there is no lamp)

Being exposed to different cultures leads to an identification with the local people. There are times I have an "aha" moment thinking, "that's why they do what they do!" Discoveries first hand make a bigger impression than reading about the culture or hearing someone else describe their experiences.

The most surprising thing to me has been reverse culture shock upon returning to America. Things I have gotten used to overseas - great public transportation, the abundance of woods with hiking trails and cheese I can afford! - I often miss when I go home. Most of all, though, I miss my new friends.

I am often eager to return to places I have been to see my friends, but I also miss my family, home and friends in the U.S. when I am overseas.  I often wish I could be in more than one place at a time.

Jesus chose to leave heaven and adapt to the limitations on earth for our sakes. He identified with us. I don't have to wonder if He misses His friends because He, unlike us, can be in both places at once. His Spirit is still with us.

And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us... (John 1:14a).

Transcending the Language Barrier

God has a great sense of humor.  I am never at a loss for words - unless I can't speak the language.  In our ministry, my husband and I travel all over the world.  I am more often than not in a situation where I cannot speak the language.

We minister often in Poland. I don't speak Polish. We go frequently to Spanish speaking countries. I can't speak Spanish. Although we lived in Germany, I only learned a small amount of German (I sometimes revert to the little German I know even in countries where it is not the national language). We spent a year ministering in France, and I don't speak French. We have traveled to Austria, Portugal, Italy, Ukraine, China and countries in the Middle East where English is not the national language. Not once could I do what I do in America - meet people on the streets and in the shops and carry on a conversation.

Although I would very much like to get to know people I meet on these trips, I am handicapped because I can't communicate in their mother tongue.  I often give locals who want to practice their English a workout, but I would rather speak to them in their own language. I wish I had a gift for languages. I don't.

The common denominator in all these places is that someone I work with speaks excellent English. I must rely on them for all the information about the area, how to conduct myself, how to shop and use the transportation system, etc. For those dear friends who are gifted in multiple languages, I pray that God will especially bless them for their service. I couldn't do what I do without them.

I am able, however, many times to get my point across without using the local language.  There are a few things that transcend the language barrier, especially in the church.

In a special service in Poland, for instance, I had a meaningful worship experience even though I didn't understand a word that was spoken. What I did understand, through song, message, testimonies and tears, was a love for God and a desire to praise Him. The language barrier was transcended by the common bond I have with the family of God. His Spirit was with us all.

Music is a special language all of itself.  Familiar tunes to hymns and choruses I hear in church services around the world make me feel at home and connected with the other worshippers.

I try to learn a few phrases in each language, especially "Good day" and "thank you." I find myself repeating those expressions over and over again, sometimes appropriately, sometimes not.  My mispronunciations are received with good natured laughter.  One of my problems is I also have issues with correctly pronouncing some words in English!

Everyone is complimented when you at least try to greet them in their mother tongue. Occasionally, I will learn an additional phrase.  In China, I also learned the expression "God bless you." I will never forget the smiles on the faces of some of my new friends as I left and said "God bless you" in Chinese.

Although I must be careful about how I do this, sometimes charades will do the trick.  That has resulted in lots of laughter, but physical demonstrations can communicate.

Intentional presence makes a statement. Even among English speakers, many times, just "being there" is the preferred message of the moment. Sometimes there is nothing that can be said to remedy a situation. It can transcend the language barrier. Facial expressions and mere presence communicates "I'm here because I care."

Expressions of greetings are different in every country.  They vary from a handshake to a one cheek kiss to a two cheek kiss to a bow to a big hug.  Even though I try to find out what is practiced locally, sometimes I just do what is natural for me and give a big hug.  I have yet to have someone chide me for this even when it is not common. Especially when I greet another woman, our eyes meet and there is a big returning smile, when I give her a hug, she returns it with gusto. It always seem to communicate.

Although I know my handicap will not be a problem in heaven, my attempts to communicate here result in a lot of laughter. After all, God does have a sense of humor.

There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus (Galatians 3:28)

The Forest and the Trees: My Perspective, God's Perspective

One of my favorite things to do is take a walk in a forest.  I love trees.  Being close to many different types of trees helps me notice certain features about them: their size and shape as well as the particular characteristics of their leaves. Especially during fall, this is an exercise in delight.  The leaves changing colors and floating to the ground right in front of me is like watching a painting in progress - a work of art only God can create.

Taking note of the intricate design of leaves, the route of gnarly tree roots and various designs of tree bark is something that can only be done close at hand. I walked recently through a small area of a forest that had been harvested. Before reaching the site, it appeared that there were no trees at all in that spot. However, walking next to it, I discovered that the area had been replanted. Those small trees would someday grow tall like their neighbors, house birds, and provide shade for small animals.

Viewing the forest from a distance, such as from above in an airplane or from a car passing by, would render these details inaccessible.  That view is also beneficial, however, as it gives a different and important perspective. Each tree in a forest is part of the whole. Without individual trees, the forest would not exist. Together, they are something more than they are alone.  

I am often reminded that God's perspective includes both the forest and the trees.  While my perspective on life is often determined by my experience, a point in time or my location, I know that God does not have those limitations. He truly does have the big picture.  He can focus on the minute details of the tree and see the forest as a whole at the same time.  The smallest detail is a part of His plan.  His perspective includes the details of my life along with everyone else's.

Knowing that God created the tree and the forest and sees the intricate details of one tree as well as the entire forest at the same time helps me cope with unknown elements of my future.  No detail in my life is inconsequential in His plan. The small things in life are significant because they are part of the whole.

The trees of the Lord are full of sap, the cedars of Lebanon which He planted, where the birds make their nests; the stork has her home in the fir trees...O Lord, how manifold are Your works! In wisdom You have made them all. The earth is full of Your possessions (Psalm 104:16, 17, 24).

Connecting the Dots: An Exercise in Understanding Life

As a child, I worked with books containing several different kinds of exercises: coloring pages, mazes, crossword puzzles and connect the dots.  My favorite was connecting the dots.  On the most complex pages, you could not tell what the picture was until you had completed the process of connecting dot number one with dot number two and so on until the last dot had been connected.  The resulting picture was already there in the background.  The creator of the page had it in mind before he removed the lines that connected each dot.  His goal was for the worker of the page to discover the picture after each dot was connected. 

I remember some of the “aha” moments I had when I had finally connected enough dots to know what each picture was going to be, but finished the exercise anyway because I wanted to see the completed picture. I might then color it, but I often left it just as it was when the last dot had been connected because I had seen all I needed to see.  The delight was in finding the hidden picture.

Steve Jobs, co-founder of Apple Inc., died this week.  In a speech he gave to the graduating class at Stanford University June 2005, his first point caught my attention. It was about connecting the dots.

Steve Job’s story of connecting the dots had to do with his own life.  He was where he was in business because of a series of events that happened, some beyond his control: the circumstances surrounding his adoption as a child, his quitting college and deciding to pursue his personal interests, his being fired at the company he started, etc.  All of these things led him to a point where he was able to accomplish certain things. Connecting those dots in retrospect helped him see the fuller picture of why he was able to do the things he did.

Steve Jobs is one of those people whose achievements greatly affected the way people live their lives.  He said connecting the dots is only possible when you look back on life, but when you do connect the dots or circumstances, situations that at first seemed to be negative can sometimes lead to a positive outcome.

Connecting the dots is my favorite way to study the Bible. The many ways to study God’s word, such as verse-by-verse exposition, character analysis, theme, book study, etc., all have great value. The important thing is to spend time reading His word, asking Him to reveal His truth to you, and making the application when it has been revealed.

Often, when I am reading God’s word, I notice the repetition of a word or a concept and start connecting those dots. For instance, when I was reading through the letters the apostle Paul wrote, I started noticing similarities in his prayers.  The result of that study was a book: The Prayer Driven Life. Paul’s prayers included prayers of blessings, thanksgiving for the saints, praise and thanksgiving to God, petitions to God on behalf of the saints, and benedictions. I never would have discovered those groupings of prayers had I not connected the dots that flowed from Romans through Philemon, and all the letters in between.

Connecting the dots of God’s word is exciting to me.  Many of my Bible studies have started that way. Connecting the dots between His word, history and current events makes sense. Reading the Bible is as currently relevant as reading today’s newspaper.  Connecting the dots between His word and the events of life takes the focus off myself and onto His plan. 

Steve Jobs was partially right.  We can only connect the dots in our own lives by looking backwards.  Christians, however, have an advantage: one of faith and trust in God who does have a plan. The resulting picture of our completed lives was already in our Creator’s mind before we were ever born.  His plan connects the dots of our past and present with our future.  As I watch the picture He has created unfold, I know I can trust the Creator to do all that is right.  

My frame was not hidden from You, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they all were written, the days fashioned for me, when as yet there were none of them (Psalm 139:15-16).

Poisonous Plants, Protection and Prayer

Like a lot of other people, I am extremely allergic to poison ivy, poison oak and poison sumac. I have done a lot of research on how to recognize these lovely plants. That is actually harder than it seems. Sometimes the recognition comes when I am in the midst of a patch of it (or after I have swung on the vine!)  Working in it sometimes cannot be avoided. What I try to avoid is the terrible consequences of not working wisely in it. Forewarned is forearmed.

There are certain types of ivy I would like to cultivate.  Although some consider English ivy a noxious plant, overtaking everything, I do like the fact that it looks good, seems to like the shade and will not create a rash like its poisonous cousin.

One of the disturbing things about the poisonous varieties is that they imitate the plants around them - making me a little nervous about every plant I come in contact with.  The leaves of three - leave them be rule does help, but the leaves may be pointed, oblong or round.  Sumac does not follow the leaves of three rule.  I must remember to watch out for a single leaf at the end of a long row of innocent looking leaves on a branch.  And. . . there is always the possibility that one of the leaves in the configuration has fallen off - so there might be two leaves in the cluster of three or the single leaf at the end of the sumac branch has disappeared.  So, my answer is to always be cautious and protect myself as much as possible.

Protection involves extra clothing - 2 layers of long sleeves and 2 layers of long trousers.  I also put on two sets of gloves just to be sure.  I lather up with Ivy Block, which is supposed to prevent oils from getting on to my skin.  When I am through, I use Tecnu Xtreme to wash off any oils that might have come through the two layers of clothing and the Ivy Block.  Somehow, even after all these precautions, I still get the rash and have to wait out the two to three weeks for it to dry up and disappear.

The offending oil on the poisonous plants is not obvious.  The leaves don't always shine.  The experts say the oil is still there even after the plant is dead.  Working in an area where poison ivy is plentiful takes all the courage I can muster, but sometimes I think the results are worth the effort.

Working around these poisonous plants make me think of life as a Christian in a worldly society.  If the Christian's life is to have any influence on the world, he must be willing to work in the midst of some fairly unpleasant circumstances.  Even when one's standards are according to God's word, just setting out in business, or shopping or traveling or any contact with others opens the possibility of being exposed to some poisonous influences.  Just as the English ivy might grow next to the poison ivy or the poison sumac resembles a harmless tree, it is not always possible to prevent all negative influences from coming into your life.

Living life as a Christian hermit is not the answer.  Fighting against those negative influences is the answer: by prevention (being so close to God you learn to recognize the evil), by protection (arming yourself with the resources the Holy Spirit has made available) and prayer (asking God to help you through the forest of good and bad).  Living the Christian life is hard, but it is worth the effort.

In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world...I have given them your word and the world has hated them, for they are not of the world any more than I am of the world. My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one (John 16:33, 17:14-15).

Playtime, Love and You

Being a grandmother brings back memories of time spent with my own sons when they were preschoolers. Then, as now, time was more plentiful than money; however, being forced to be creative in our playtime was, and still is, a good thing. Especially with the current economic situation, parents and grandparents are sharing tips that have worked for them as they help their children enjoy life without spending much money. 

I have noticed that expensive toys often spend the largest part of their time lying in the toy box or closet. Although rotating toys helps, after the novelty wears off again, they must then be put up once more or even given away.

Toy companies are expert at advertising, but not always so clever at creating toys children can really enjoy. A lot of toys do not hold the interest of a small child. Some toys wind up and do their own thing while the child sits by and watches. Some are just too difficult to play with. My husband and I bought the biggest and best transformer for one of our grandsons, but it was so hard to put together, I'm not sure he ever played with it.  I have discovered it is the simpler versions they like the best.   

Children love to work with their hands. Give a child time to play in a sandpile with old margarine tubs, kitchen utensils (sifters, spoons, etc.) and he can create anything - forts, farms, trains, churches, or just plain mud pies.

When my children were small, unless we had to go somewhere, I didn't worry about them getting dirty. They loved it. In fact, on nice warm days, they could water the dirt and have extra fun with mud. This kind of dirt play is not only enjoyable for children, it also develops small muscle coordination and their imagination. Playing outside makes them more aware of all the good things God has created for them to enjoy.

Just as children love to play in dirt and sand, they enjoy play dough or clay. I found homemade play dough lasted much longer than the purchased kind. Cookie cutters and plastic items from the kitchen are great things to use with play dough.

A lot of throw away items hold charm for a child: old clothes, bits of wood (with no splinters), old wooden spools, spray can tops, plastic bottles (not pill bottles), and boxes of all sizes. Uses are limited only to the imagination of the child. Children love to create something of their own. One of my grandsons is especially good at making something out of practically nothing.  I am always looking forward to seeing what he has created. 

Furniture boxes make a great play house. We sometimes placed one on a patio or the corner of a son's room. It became his private domain - with endless possibilities - a hideaway, a spaceship, an office like Dad's, etc. I just cut out a door and a window and let my sons do the rest.  They also often created a hideaway underneath the kitchen table, spreading a large blanket over the table and letting their imagination run wild.  

I remember camping out in the backyard with our young sons. My husband spread a blanket over two lawn chairs and fixed a pallet underneath for the boys. We slept on cots beside them. We had snacks outside that night and even took our portable television outside on the patio. The boys loved it and slept soundly.

When my children were crawlers and toddlers, I installed childproof openers on the cabinets I didn't want them getting into and put all plastics and light tin pots and pans in the remaining cabinets. While I worked in the kitchen, they would entertain themselves stacking the plastic bowls, banging tin dishes together and even crawling into the empty cabinet for a hideout. I remember one time in particular when my oldest son was about seven or eight months old, his grandparents, his Dad and I observed as he stacked pots and pans together matching the right lids to the proper pans. He struggled with a drip coffee pot until he got all the parts together again the right way which took him a good ten minutes. During all this time, he was concentrating so hard that he didn't even notice that he had an audience!

The most important of all is time a parent or grandparent spends playing with his child. I am so proud of my sons and their wives as they are taking advantage of every minute they have with their young children, recognizing that this stage does not last forever. There comes a time when a child is not as interested in spending all their time with their family, but for a preschooler or elementary age child, there is no one that can take the place of his parent.

During the important formative years, God made young children somewhat possessive of his parents in order to use this golden opportunity to influence that child for good.

Grandchildren are the crowning glory of the aged; parents are the pride of their children (Proverbs 17:6 NLT)

The Miracle of Adoption

My newest grandchild became a part of my family today. I haven't met her yet, but I have been anticipating her arrival for three years.

In September 2008, my son and his wife felt God calling them to adopt a child - preferably a girl.  They have two terrific natural born sons, so they are in the minority of people who choose to adopt.  Since most couples adopt because they can't have children any other way, my son and his wife did not request a newborn. Wanting to keep the existing birth order in their family, they did ask for a child under three.

Anyone who has been through an adoption process or is related to someone who has knows that adoptions are expensive and enormously time consuming.  Deciding to adopt a child makes a bold statement.  Parents (and in some cases, siblings) are willing to pay the price to adopt a child.

In their case, two adoption agencies (the first one didn't work out), much money and three years later, the day has finally arrived.

With all the hiccups in the process, one blog entry of my daughter-in-law's was "God has a plan, God has a plan, God has a plan."  Today, we know what that plan was.

In September 2008 Olivia's birth mother was in her first trimester. After giving birth to Olivia seven months later (March 2009), she left her on a doorstep. Found, she was taken to a foster home that works with our family's adoption agency.

The referral from the agency came just after Olivia's second birthday in March 2011. As soon as we all saw her picture, we knew why God allowed the delay. Everyone instantly knew that Olivia belonged to our family. She was not even born when they started the process with the first agency.

Olivia's family is in China. They picked her up today. It was such a delight to receive pictures of her with her brothers and parents.

Olivia will know she is adopted. She will know that she is loved and wanted. She will be told that she was longed-for, chosen and considered worth any price that had to be paid so she could be part of the family.

God, the Father, and God, the Son wanted, longed-for and chose to adopt those who accepted the sacrificial gift offered by Jesus Christ. Through the inspiration of God's Holy Spirit, He has told us that His adopted children are wanted, longed-for, chosen. He paid the highest price for each child of His: the life and death of His only begotten Son.


to all who believed him and accepted him, he gave the right to become children of God... So the Word became human and made his home among us. He was full of unfailing love and faithfulness. And we have seen his glory, the glory of the Father's one and only Son... God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure (John 1:12, 14, Ephesians 1:5 NLT).